I walk my ginger cookie dog Rusty every morning in the hour just before dawn. It’s a sweet time. A gift from heaven.
Peaceful. Quiet. A writer’s blessing.
The hush before the alarms go off. The kettles plug in. Showers turn on. The Today Show announces another incomprehensible tragedy.
We walk the same circle route every morning. I’m a creature of habit. So is Rusty.
He likes to poop in the same spots. I carry white plastic grocery bags to scoop up after him. It’s all part of our daily dance.
This morning, when we got to the bend in the road, the glorious spot at the crest of the hill, I caught a glimpse of eternity.
The lights below flickered like halos as the world awoke.
At that moment I wanted to fly. Spread my arms. And take off. Rusty has floppy ears that were engineered for flight. I have big hair.
We can do this.
I stopped and looked out at the glorious sunrise and thought how lovely and endless these days are. Filled with the promise of forever.
But they aren’t of course.
I thought of my mother. How this particular orange of the sky would have inspired her to paint.
What a view. Oh God what a divine view. Tears came unexpectedly.
One day, if I’ve done this right, I will be the memory. I will be the gentle tear brushed from the cheek of one of my children.