The Chambermaid.

Recently a friend shared a post on LinkedIn about her first “career” job after she graduated from university. At the end of her enlightening and thoughtful post she posed these questions to her readers: “Where did you get your start? Any learnings that you carry forward from that experience?”

These questions sparked some reminiscing about the start of my career after I finished university with two degrees – one for each hand. And what I had learned. My friend had one job after graduating that started her career path.

I had three before my current career got off the ground. But it was the first one that I learned the most valuable and memorable lessons. To many it would not be considered a “career” job but to me it was the first step to where I am right now.

After I received my Bachelor of Education to teach English and History at the Secondary Level, I was offered a job at one of the local high schools where I did one of my practicums. It was a good opportunity that most brand-new teachers, fresh off the university lot, would have jumped at. The perfect launching pad for a lifelong career in teaching with a decent salary, summers off, Christmases off, Easter and Spring breaks off, benefits and a healthy pension.

But it wasn’t for me. At least not at that time in my life.

Instead of staying put and playing it safe in my hometown, where I was sheltered by my family and close to friends, I packed my bags, propped my son on my hip, adjusted my aviator sunglasses, and hopped on a plane and headed west. I’d be lying if I said I didn’t look back. Because I did. I even went back. But not after living a year in British Columbia, first in Victoria and then Prince George (where I got married but that’s a whole other story.)

My first job after graduating from university was as a Chambermaid at an old established hotel in downtown Victoria. I had the option of working in one of the nightclubs in the hotel but chose the reliable daytime hours of housekeeping, even though it was less pay, and tips were few and far between, because it allowed a more stable lifestyle for me and my son. Plus, I’ve never been much of a night person. Neither was my son.

I learned a lot working as a Chambermaid.

First and foremost, it’s hard back-breaking work that is under-valued, under-appreciated, under-paid, under-respected and under-tipped (as in “no tips”, at least way back then in the dark ages). I was left with a deep and abiding respect for all the hard-working people (mostly women) doing this thankless job tirelessly day after day. And with surprising cheerfulness, grace, and discretion. I learned that there is dignity in working hard and getting the job done, regardless of the position or pay.

The second thing I learned, which was more of an observation. Every room tells a story. The morning after. The remnants and residue from the night before were scattered around the room like breadcrumbs in the forest. These artifacts covered the gamut, the entire enchilada, the rainbow spectrum, from shitty diapers to shitty sheets. Loose change to loose talk. Broken glass to broken hearts. The walls held the whispers of conversations, the floors the burden of footsteps of every ilk, the bed the weight of humanity, often at its worst. The Chambermaids were the reconnaissance unit of housekeeping, the first to step foot into what was often unknown territory. The brave souls who cleaned up the mess. And restored order.

They made the room. They kept the secrets. Then they moved on to the next room, the next story. The seeds of my storytelling career were sowed here.

The third thing I learned, and this is by far the most important. To be grateful. Grateful to have a safe, comfortable place to stay when I’m in a foreign place, grateful that gracious people are there to make it comfortable, and most of all, grateful that I’ve never had to do that job again. Not that it’s beneath me, because it truly isn’t, but because I don’t think I was all that good at it. I never really mastered the fine art of hospital corners.

That gratitude has held fast for me all these decades later. I am eternally grateful for all the positions I’ve held over the years, especially in advertising, and to the companies I have worked for, including my current work. Every one of them helped put a roof over my family’s head and food on the table. They sparked my creativity and challenged me to always keep growing, learning, and improving my craft. Plus, so many friendships we forged and wonderful memories were made.

To all the Chambermaids across the globe, thank you, thank you, thank you.

Diaries of The Breadman’s Daughter: Don’t Settle.

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Girl Warrior. Don’t settle. Go along with, resign or reconcile yourself, stomach, swallow or submit to anything that doesn’t ring true to the bright and shiny person you are.

Don’t live a default life. A ‘learn to live with’ life. An involuntary life. Or worse yet, one that belongs to someone else. And you’re just going along for the ride. Sitting complacently, but maybe not so comfortably, in the back seat or sidecar. You belong behind the wheel of your own life, the one of your own making. Steer your spaceship courageously in the direction of your dreams. Not someone else’s. That’s your mission, your primary assignment here.

You only get to do this present-life thing one time, and one time only, Girl Warrior. And it is oh so very brief. So fleeting. A flutter of the butterfly’s wing. Yes, some things are eternal. Our souls. The tender memories of us. But this here-and-now Earth Walk, and all the glorious people, places and things that are gifted to us are here for such a woefully brief time. So don’t squander any of it by settling.

Don’t settle in. Don’t settle down. Don’t settle for. Anything. And that goes for the people in your life, the work you do, the place where you live, the man or woman you’re involved with, and most importantly, the desires of your heart.

Girl Warrior, don’t be afraid that if you choose not to settle you’ll be all alone. You won’t. Quite the opposite is true. You’ll be surrounded by your loving and brave Tribe of kindred spirits who also refused to settle for anything less than an authentic life.

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Diaries of The Breadman’s Daughter: Define Your Own Success.

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Girl Warrior. Determine your own definition of what being successful means. Like many of the big things you’ll do, this is an inside job. Start there. Take a long hard close look inwards at the person you are today. The one you were yesterday, last week, last month, last year, or as many years back as your memory will take you.

Then ask yourself this question. Who is this person?

Chances are, this person is somewhere on the growth chart between ‘not quite there yet’ and ‘done like dinner.’ Regardless of where you stand on the Spectrum of Light (SOL) you are incomparably perfect. Not flawless. Not without blemishes or warts. Not pristine. But perfect, not in spite of these things but because of them.

With this perspective in mind, and under your own personal magnifying glass, go in closer to see all the people, places and things that truly matter to you. What inspires your soul? Fills your mind with wonder and curiosity? Makes your heart flutter with happiness. Brings tears of joy to your eyes? Scares the shit right out of you? What drives and propels you forward? What makes you want to get up in the morning? What would you rather be doing more than anything else? What does an ideal day look like? Who do you like to be with? Who’s in your tribe and who’s missing that you wish was there? How do you find bliss? Where do you want to go? When do you start living your life? Why does it matter? And, the really great big huge colossal critical question, why are you here?

Once you have probed deeply and truthfully into the answers to these soul-searching questions, you can start to formulate a picture of what success means to you. Notice that these are questions you ask of yourself. This is a very personal quest and is nobody else’s business. Not your parents, friends, teachers, therapists, colleagues, pop icons, social media stars, fashion freaks, political leaders or anyone else that you may be under the influence. Not their life. Not their definition. Not this time.

Know this, being successful lies in your answers to these vital life-affirming questions. Only these. It’s not about wealth or power or influence or status or jobs or fame or fortune or getting ahead or climbing some corporate ladder. It’s about loving, honoring and respecting the person looking back at you in the mirror every day. It’s about knowing that your presence on Planet Earth matters.

Most importantly Girl Warrior, it’s about knowing that your life is a success because you live it fully and completely, with the utmost integrity and authenticity. And always, always, always according to your own definition. On your terms.

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Diaries of The Breadman’s Daughter: Never Give Up.

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Girl Warrior. Never give up. No matter what. Go get all the wonderful and truly wicked things you want out of this life. Chase unapologetically after your dreams. Pursue them persistently. Passionately. Purposefully.

Follow your bliss. Wherever it takes you. This is your quest. All yours Girl Warrior. Imagine that beautiful butterfly.

There will be obstacles in your path. Guaranteed. Road blocks. Landslides. Washouts. Detours, diversions and distractions. All kinds of barriers, hurdles and little sneaky snags. It’s okay if you trip and fall when you hit one of these. Your job is to get back in the saddle, on the bike, behind the wheel, on your feet. Don’t hesitate when this happens. Steady yourself. Stay on course. Reset your sights if need be. Do whatever it takes. The idea is to keep heading in the direction of your brass ring.

Keep your wits about you. Not everyone will get what you’re doing. Along the way you’ll encounter dream crushers and naysayers. These are easy to spot because they are the ones who are quick to squash, smash and suppress the desires of your brave lion-heart. Shut their voices down quickly and carry on. The tougher ones are the well-meaning folks, who for whatever reason, don’t get behind your calling. Wish these people well, bless them, love them, and move on.

Know that you are tougher than any storm. There isn’t anything you can’t weather. Go out there and be someone’s pain in the ass. Be the squeaky wheel that insists on being oiled. Be tenacious. Courageous. Audacious. Strong-willed and stubborn as a mule if need be.

But always be patiently persistent. Remember this on the dark days. It will pay off big-time in the end Girl Warrior.

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